Progressive Field

A Review with Zero Words Spoken

Cleveland, Ohio

The Review

by Arthur Young
July 30th, 2019

First Review Without Any Words!

The hot dog looked like any other... But something in it put Arthur into such a quiet, self-reflective mood that he danced the night away without a care in the world! Never had we seen him so short on words but high on energy!

We tried one run-of-the-mill dog and one that had upgraded condiments. Both were nice, reliable ways to check off your "must have hotdog" to-do list during a game. But we stayed away from the Happy Dogs they were serving out in left field as they appeared to be the "pile style" hot dogs and were quite a bit more expensive. We weren't down for that this time.

Today's review has little outward confirmation that Arthur's hot dog was great except for a quick thumbs-up before he shuffled his way back to the seats to watch the Cleveland Indians drop a game to Justin Verlander and the Huston Astros. It might have been Arthur's energy leading to this outcome because Justin is one of his favorite players, a product of hearing his name called out as MVP every time we turn on MLB 2K12 on the XBOX 360.

Regardless of what voodoo was being practiced that night everyone had a great time and went home happy. Today's review is the first (and maybe the only?) totally devoid of any dialogue! There might have been something in that hot dog, and the only way you'll know is if you go have one too.

The Experience: 7.50

THE WIENER

16 out of 20: The sausages are fine quality, somewhat pedestrian and not the star of the show here.

THE HOT DOG

14 out of 20: Most hot dogs at a ball park are pretty straightforward at a ball park, and this is one of them.

THE SERVICE

7 out of 10: People are nice, friendly and usually in a good mood here. Today was no excpetion.

THE VALUE

6 out of 10: We're all used to paying a bit much for amenities at major league parks, the price here was not out-of-line.

THE ATMOSPHERE

10 out of 10: For a baseball fan, how can you beat this atmosphere! The Indians know how to keep the fans engaged.

THE LOCATION

10 out of 10: Given that we're a captive audience the location of a hot dog stand inside the park can't be beat!

THE "LAGNIAPPE"

6 out of 10: The energy of the crowd makes sharing a hot dog with those you love all the more special here.

THE "JE NE SAIS QUOI"

6 out of 10: I can't put me finger on it... But Progressive Stadium has the vibe shared by many Major League ball parks.

Click for Website:

https://www.mlb.com/guardians/ballpark

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Click for Navigation:

2401 Ontario St, Cleveland, OH 44115

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Click to Call:

216-420-4200

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BUN-LENGTH SUMMARY

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Arthur is rarely shy when it comes to storytelling - especially when you combine two things he loves, hot dogs and baseball. But something magical about this evening - or this hot dog - put him into rare form where he danced the night away without a care in the world...

Come see if a hot dog at Progressive Stadium has the same effect on you!

Some concerns that may be significant for certain patrons may have been omitted as "less relevant" to the theme of this review. Please consider additional sources of information before planning your visit.

WEEN-O-METER

One hot dog is all it took for Arthur to become electrocharged, smiling and dancing the night away with seldom another word spoken. He was in the zone!

WEENOMETER RANK:   PARKTASTIC!

DANCING WEINERS

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DANCING FANS

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SOMETHING IN THE SAUSAGE

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NEIGHBORHOOD

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DEEP KNEE BENDS

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